And this is the post where I am utterly exhausted

ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I am so tired that I am literally dreaming about sleeping as I'm half-awake and gulping down my third cup of coffee or driving and drinking my second iced coffee of the day (the guy at the coffee kiosk knows me, my kids, their names, and my order -- medium iced Americano, whole milk and cream, two sugars -- and he can empathize because he and his wife have three kids under the age of five. What are we, crazy? Haven't we heard of birth control?!)

Anyway, it has been one of those days. And I'm being one of those people, and using my blog as if it were a personal diary where I can just vent. Eh, whatever. I was tempted to hit my head against the wall, or make myself a really strong martini, so I'm doing this instead. Also doing this instead of finishing the laundry or cleaning up the half-pound of cheese and the bowl of rice that Anika has strewn around the house. I'm still in my spit-up-stained shirt and should be doing something useful, like maybe brushing my teeth, but I feel too tired to stand up at the moment. I think it is because Anika started whimpering at 5 a.m. and from that moment on, I had both kids absolutely needing every second of my attention all day. Neither one wanted to nap, and neither one wanted to go to bed. They are finally asleep and I'm almost too tired to go to bed myself. But we are out of diapers, and out of food, and ohmygod I forgot how HUNGRY one gets when one is nursing a baby who has put on nearly 1/6th of his body weight in the past month. He is now 12 pounds 5 ounces and bears a striking resemblance to Jabba the Hutt in Return of the Jedi. I don't remember Anika eating this much or this often, and I feel like a free bar at a redneck wedding.